**Paradox

I was thirsty, but I chose to eat blue berries from the lane instead
I was hungry, but I chose to drink a glass of rosé wine with my book instead
I was lonely, but I chose to sit in my solitude and watch the snow fall instead
I was cold, but I chose to go for a walk without my Laura Ashley coat instead

I was missing you, but I chose to shut you away never to open the doors ever instead
I was hugging you, but I chose to bruise your skin in agony and tantrum instead
I was hoping to be a hero, but paradox of emotions villainized the actor in me instead
I was meaning to love you, but my heart reminded me to hate to feel love instead.

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